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Dating & Friendship for the Over 40s...

First time date.

First Date

First time meetings can make us all feel a little apprehensive – its all well and good emailing and talking on the phone…..but to meet someone in the flesh can make even the bravest shake a little.
Regardless of your age, this is one situation that doesn’t seem to improve with maturity!

So imagine this – after numerous emails and a few phone calls, the date is set for ‘Saturday Night!’. We agree to meet halfway at a lovely old Yorkshire country pub. Now the worrying in earnest begins.
Will he like me? will he think i look like my photo? will he like what
i am wearing? – hang on!! – what about him?! will he look like his
photo? You hear so many stories about old photo’s on profiles or
photo’s taken on holidays when we all look so glamorous and sun
kissed. The stark truth is that it is now February and how many of us
still look as trim after a long, cold winter spent eating comforting
stews and stodge?!

I decide that i need something new to wear. The dilemma now begins –
smart? smart/casual? casual? – its a wardrobe nightmare! I choose
several tops and take them into the changing room. On trying on the
first one I am horrified to see how open it is at the front (verging
on the indecent) until i realise i have put it on back to front –
typical. After trying it on the right way and nearly pulling my neck
trying to see the back I decide it looks good – the colour suits me
and it makes me feel sexy and confident (always a bonus for a first
time meeting) so that’s a yes then!

I clock watch for the rest of the afternoon – in between painting my
nails and partaking in various beauty treatment – the things we put
ourselves through in the name of beauty! About an hour before the date
I shower, do my hair and make up and get dressed. Now I don’t know
about you but when it gets near to the meeting time I start to get a
bit hyper. The adrenaline kicks in and I cant keep myself still. I
start to sing along to the radio (scarily the song is Gloria’s “i will
survive” – A good or bad omen?!)

I start to think “why do I do this to myself?” I decide to do a few
star jumps to see if I can use up some of this surplus anxiety that is
rising to the surface, but land on a shoe and fall to the bed – this
gives me the giggles which turns to an almost hysterical rant. I hear
the neighbours next door and consider I am making too much noise –
they might be concerned for my safety!

I walk out to the car like the convicted walk to the gallows (i
thought this was supposed to be fun?). I jump into the car and zip off
to the allotted meeting place. Looking around it is apparent I am here
first, so I nip back to the car to ring my mate for some moral support
– after hearing her laugh at me for 5 minutes I decide i would have
been better ‘asking the audience’ instead of phoning a ‘friend’! We
decide this has got to be better than stopping in on a Saturday…..is
it really?….and then i see a car pull in to the car park (gulp).
“Calm down” my friend advises – “take a deep breath and relax”. I am
breathing as though I am labour – almost a pant really. Not a good
look for a prospective date!

He gets out of his car and starts walking over to me – I quickly jump
out of my car,whilst trying not to stare; but this is definitely the
man in his profile picture and he is smiling (!). I turn around to
double check there is no-one behind me, but yep, he is smiling at me.
“Hi Elaine” he says, I realise that my mouth is hung open and I make a
concerted effort to shut it and I manage to squeak out a “hello – are
you Neil?”, “that’s me” he replies “pleased to meet you” and he leans
in to kiss me on the cheek. I turn my head slightly and his kiss
lands on the corner of my mouth (WOW).

He looks amazing and I seem to have lost the ability to talk which is
something quite amazing for me! He has obviously made an effort and
looks great for an over 50 and he smells divine – which is always
attractive. As we walk to the entrance of the pub I have a huge smile
on my face now and think to myself “mmmmmmm, this dating lark is quite
good really”.